


Never Think.

by lovelyagainhappily



Category: One Direction (Band), Radio 1 RPF
Genre: Fluff, Gryles, Kid Fic, M/M, Mild Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-09
Updated: 2014-09-09
Packaged: 2018-02-16 19:26:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2281749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovelyagainhappily/pseuds/lovelyagainhappily
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry and Nick are lovers, Harry goes away for so long, and Nick doesn't go anywhere.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Never Think.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [trixie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/trixie/gifts).



_All stories have a beginning, so does this one. Our story begins with a lanky, long-haired boy, and a popular radio show host. Harry always wanted to be a singer, he never cared if he made it to Hollywood, or even put out a hit album. Harry never cared, never ever. Harry wanted to make people happy; bring people joy when they heard his music, that was what he yearned for. When he'd heard that his mother signed him up for x-factor he was overjoyed; On the other hand, his stomach churned at the thought, and he could feel his pulse pounding against his throat. He was the most nervous he'd ever been, but also the most excited he'd ever been._

_The day that Nick was called into the BBC headquarters was the best, and possibly worst day of his life. He was ultimately sure that he was going to lose his breakfast in front of his boss; (Or all over his boss), or that he was going to be fired. Either of these seemed like the most awful, horrid thing in the universe. As he opened those tall glass doors, his heart pounded out of his chest, and his throat closed off. He was definitely going to be sick, but he had to get this meeting over with, "Nick, very nice to see you this morning." He heard the voice of his boss, and he slowly sat down in a chair, sure he was going to be fired. His boss smiles at him, putting his hands on the table, "I'm not going to keep you waiting any longer, I can see the nervousness on your face. We're promoting you to be the host of The Breakfast Show, congratulations, Nick!" Nick was in awe, he never expected to hear that. The next Monday he would start speaking to all of Britain, every morning. And so began his journey to meeting Harry Styles, the boy who would ruin (And complete) his life. Enough about the past, let's see where this couple is today._

 

"Hi Harry, if you could please call me back, that would be great- or, um, I-.." There was a long pause in Nick's message, before Harry's voice mail box beeped a sharp, short end tone, signaling that the message ended, "You have three unheard messages." rang out the robotic voice into Harry's ear, before playing the next message. Nick's breathing was heavy, and he surely had been crying, "Sorry, the- um..Message cut off. I...Harry, please call me back. I don't know what to say anymore. I don't know what to do. I don't even know where you a-" and there was the dreaded end tone, cutting Nick off again. The next message began, "Fucking bloody shit message." Nick grumbled out over the phone, huffing into it. He took a sharp inhale, starting back up, "Anyways, I really need to see you, I have no idea where you are o-" at this point, Harry was frustrated, but almost laughing, humored by the way the phone was cutting Nick off; recently the both of them had felt that the whole world was against them, or at least Harry had. It felt like whatever powers that ruled; God, fate, destiny, whatever, had been keeping them apart, ripping them away from each other; it was a major relief for Harry to even hear Nick speak. The final message played through Harry's phone, "It cut me off again. I just wanted to say that I'm sorry, I'm worried, and I miss you. I know you're pissed, and I'm sorry." those were the last words Harry heard before the final end tone blipped out, then automatically hung up from his voice mail inbox. 

 

"Harry." Lou chirped, poking her head into the dressing room where Harry was currently sitting, "You've got to be on stage in twenty minutes. All the other boys are waiting and ready, let me finish your hair." 

"Yeah." Harry mumbled out, his mind floating to Nick. He followed her to the hair and makeup chair, sitting in it and closing his eyes. He inhaled and exhaled slowly, but a bit harshly. He knew he couldn't text while Lou did his hair, and he most certainly couldn't call. The show was at least three hours, and then he needed a shower, maybe some dinner, and then he had to get some sleep; there would be no time for him to call Nick, or even text him, and it was driving Harry absolutely mad. Again Harry felt it, his heart longing, yearning for Nick; He wanted to be in Nick's bed, in his arms, or anywhere with him, really. His skin almost burned at the thought of Nick's skin against his, near his. All he wanted was Nick. 

"Harry, Love, what's on your mind?" Lou said, glancing at him as she spread pomade through Harry's curls, tugging on a few with her product-covered fingers, smearing the pomade against his strands of hair, coating them thoroughly. Her words snapped Harry out of his mind, and he looks up at her, biting on his lips, sighing softly. 

"Nothing, just.." He sighs out, slumping his shoulders a bit, trying to focus on her hands in his hair, closing his eyes again. This was most certainly the wrong thing to do; Harry began to imagine that those were Nick's hands in his hair. Nick's long, thin fingers combing through his wild hair, working out any tangles or knots carefully, his head in Nick's lap, the tv idly on in the background, its faint noises filling Nick's living room. He got shivers down his spine as he remember how it felt to have Nick's hands in his hair whilst he was falling asleep on his lap, a blanket draped over him, and his nose poking against Nick's lower stomach. 

"Just what?" Lou asked him, looking at him, crossing her arms and raising her eyebrows, her voice snapping him out of his mind again.

"Just, I.." Harry sighs, opening his eyes again, looking around, his heart sinking as soon as he realized he wasn't actually with Nick, "I..Nick and I are having some problems and stuff. We still haven't made up from the whole Nicco thing." He mumbles weakly, rubbing hands over his face, rubbing at the bags under his eyes. He relaxes back into the chair, watching her expression closely, "I'm not still mad, if that's what you think. I forgave him a long time ago, but, I don't think I could take something like that again, and..I suppose it's me not trusting him, me not wanting to get hurt, but he keeps calling, texting, everything, and every time I try to contact him back I'm busy or something, and.." He sighs, looking down and shaking his head. 

"And you miss him." She sighs, smiling a caring smile, "Everyone can see, Harry. We're not blind, we know you miss Nick, it's pretty obvious. I can tell this is really taking a major toll on you. I'll talk to a few people and see if I can get you a free hour or so tomorrow, so that you two can call or something and work it all out. I hate seeing you like this, and I know that the boys do. It's time for you two to make up, and properly talk, Harry. It's been five years."

"And five years is a long time." Harry said, biting the inside of his cheek; he got up, adjusting his clothes for the show, and kissed Lou's head, striding over to where the boys were waiting. 

 

It had been months since Nick had even had any contact with Harry; he hadn't had a text, call, or anything. The last text he had from Harry was one word; "cool." And that was the last thing Nick had read from Harry, and that was six months ago. The last time Nick had  _seen_  Harry was two years ago. They bumped into each other at the market on the corner, and it was painfully awkward. Harry did an awkward smile, moved his long, wild hair out of his eyes, glanced over Nick, and just mumbled a soft apology, then walked away to pay, like Nick was a stranger. 

So when Harry rung Nick up that night, Nick most certainly wasn't prepared. The TV was on, as it usually was, and Nick was sprawled on the couch, half asleep with a bottle of Chardonnay tucked in-between his arm and his chest, "Mm, listen, Aimes, if you're ringing me to ask me to come out, I'm already having a party by meself, alright? Feel no need to drag me into some shitty club and try to hook me up with a bloke who is way too much of a slag for me." 

"You sound awful." Were the first words out of Harry's mouth, along with a light chuckle, "Are you drunk?" 

"Fucking shit." Nick instantly sat up, the bottle sliding off the couch, shattering with a loud crash all over the floor, "Hell." He gasped, swallowing, "Um, Hi, Harry, um, I..Give me a 'mo." He whispered, rushing to grab something to clean the glass off the ground, and a rag for the wine. 

"Grim." Harry sighs heavily, biting his lip, "Nick, calm down, yeah? S'just me." 

"S'just you, is all." Nick laughs, scoffing a bit, "S'just bloody Harry fucking popstar Styles who's ignored me for ages. No biggie, right?"

"Nick." Harry whispers out, taking a shaky breath, "Nick, please, don't..Don't be like that."

"Don't be like what?" He mumbles, sitting back on the couch, sniffling, "Don't be hurt? Don't be angry at you for ignoring me?"

"I've been busy!" Harry almost shouts, trying to stay calm.

"Apparently you've been booked for five years, huh? What about that vacation in Greece?" 

"Nick, I.."

"Don't, Harry. Don't try to make excuses with me."

"I've been writing." He mumbles, sighing weakly, "It isn't an excuse, I'm..I've been scared, and worried."

"And I have been too, and you've been writing, huh? Well what about? Some shag you've boned?"

"No!" Harry finally shouts, his voice cracking. At this point, his vision was blurred with tears, and his chest was aching, "I've been fucking writing about you, you twat."

"Oh." Nick breathes out, looking at his legs, frowning, "Yeah, um.. Sorry."

"Me too. Apparently I've made a mistake, and it wasn't ignoring you." Harry hung up after that, going straight for the bathroom, needing to be completely alone where nobody could bother him. 

 Nick looked at his phone, frowning deeply. He turned off his phone, setting it on the coffee table; so many thoughts ran through his head. He'd just fucked up his one chance to make things better with Harry, and he knew he probably wouldn't get another one. He needed Harry, he really did. He loved him so much, and as much as he seemed like a dick sometimes, he was trying his hardest. He didn't want to get hurt or hurt Harry. Sometimes, this caused him to remove himself from Harry's life, caused him to hide himself, and he knew Harry hated that. Harry just wanted to be with him and around him. Harry wanted to know all his ins-and-outs and he knew it drove Harry crazy when he pulled away, but it looked like now Nick was where Harry usually was. He felt like Harry was a stranger to him; like all he knew was his name, he was just another person to interview on The Breakfast Show, another celebrity. This drove Nick insane, and he had to fix it, but first, he needed to sleep and sober up. Nick slowly got up, stumbling over any little thing in the floor, holding onto the wall as he made his way to his bedroom, looking at the bed, frowning. He remembered the last time Harry was in his bed, the last time they touched, the last time Nick made Harry moan and whimper and how they whispered soft I love yous before they fell asleep, cuddled up next to each other. Nick's heart practically leaped out of his chest, almost as if it wanted to kill itself, clawing and pounding against Nick's chest. Apparently Nick's body wanted him to just die, he was worried that Harry might feel the same way as well. His head spun with all these thoughts, as well as the large amount of alcohol he had consumed. He flopped against his soft mattress, closing his heavy, tired eyes, letting out an exhausted breath, reaching for the covers next to him, frowning when he didn't put a hand on Harry. When Nick was drunk, all his filters were off, he hardly knew where he was, much less that Harry was probably on the other side of the universe in some posh hotel room with satin sheets. He fell quickly into a drunk sleep, sleeping heavily with his face pressed into a pillow. 

 

Harry spent the next day regretting that he'd even spoken to Nick, but also regretting hanging up on him, he wanted to just plunge himself into an insane mob of fans at the thought. Nick was drunk and upset, and he'd hung up on him. After that night, he'd not been able to get a hold of him, his texts weren't even being delivered. Harry was scared, extremely scared, extremely worried. He knew how Nick got when he was drunk. Nick was reckless, clingy, lonely, and very, very fragile. The littlest word could set him off, and that's what Harry was scared of; surely someone would have called Harry or tried to contact him if something had happened to Nick. If Nick had hurt himself or something of the sort. Unless they hadn't found him, and he was just lying there dead somewhere in the house. Panic set in quickly, Harry rushed to find his phone, flying through his contacts and dialing Nick's number at a rapid pace, his breathing uneven. Again, it went straight to voicemail, Harry's mind raced and so did his heart; his lungs weren't much better, his breathing becoming wheezy and erratic. 

"Harry." Niall said quickly, rushing over to him, "Feckin' shit, breathe." He said, rubbing Harry's face, frowning, "Zayn, fuck, get his inhaler." 

Zayn jumped up, rummaging around. As soon as he set hands on it, he shook it up and primed it, walking to the other side of Harry, opposite of Niall, "Harry, you've got to exhale." He mumbles, rubbing his back. 

Harry coughed out, exhaling weakly, looking up at Zayn, his pupils blown wide. 

"Yeah." Zayn whispers, rubbing his back, holding the inhaler for him, pushing it down, dispensing the medicine for Harry to inhale, "You'll be okay, Harry, breathe, you'll be alright." He mumbles, rubbing a hand over his hair. 

Harry inhaled the medicine rapidly, his breathing slowly coming back to normal after about half an hour. He glances at Zayn and Niall, nodding slowly, "Thanks, boys, I owe you." He sighs, rubbing his face, trying to stay calm. 

"No you don't!" Niall smiles softly at him, "We love ya' and you don't need to pay us back or anything, we just want ta' make sure that you're alright."

"Yeah." Harry smiles back warmly, nodding, "I'm alright, love you too, thank you." 

"Glad you're feeling better." Louis smiles, poking his head in, "Liam and I have a friend for you." 

"A friend?" Harry raises his eyebrows, a small pout on his face. "Um, okay." He nods, "I guess, bring them in?"

"Okay." Louis smiled widely, stepping out of the way of the door, Nick walking in. 

"Holy fucking shit, you didn't." Harry said, looking at him, hands shaking. 

"Hi." Nick mumbles, looking at his feet, "Um, they didn't. I flew out here on my own, I wanted to apologize, for like, everything, but I was a dick on the phone the other night and I just wa- oof." Nick groans as Harry's body is slamming against his into a breathtaking squeeze. 

"Nick." Harry almost cries, pressing his face into Nick's neck, sniffling, "You fucking bastard. You fucking piece of shit asshole. I can't fucking, you fucking idiot. I hate you." He mumbles, hugging him even tighter, the younger man shaking a tiny bit. 

"Hey, um, Okay." Nick whispers, rubbing a hand down Harry's back, "I um, I hate you too?" He said, sighing heavily. 

"You fucking turned your phone off after I hung up on you. I thought you were like, dead or something!" He cries, kissing Nick quickly, then pulled away, biting his lip, "Shit." He whispers, looking at Nick with wide eyes. 

"Harry." Nick whispers back, cupping his face, "I love you and I'm so fucking sorry and I know it'll be tough to trust me again, but I promise that I want nobody else but you; you're all I've been thinking about and every night I can't help but want you in bed next to me and I want you in my house and in my kitchen and I want to bake with you and drink with you and -- Everything with you." He whispers, pecking his lips softly, "I know it'll take time for us to work this all out, and I know I don't talk like this much, I have problems with commitment and I'll admit it, I'm scared of losing you. You go all around the world and see so many guys and girls who are probably so much more interesting and hotter and have it all, and I'm just some washed-up, wrinkly radio host, but I fucking love you, Harry Styles. I love you with all my fucking heart and I need you. I need every hair on your head and every pore on your body. I need you and all of you and I can't settle for anyone less. My whole life I've grown up thinking that love and all that shit was a myth, but you've made me realize that soulmates can be real and that someone can make you feel complete, and make you so much of a better person. You make me a better person, and you're the only one for me. I need you, Harry. Please, please forgive me, and just let me come back." 

Harry watched him intently the whole time he was speaking, and just nods when he's done, tears filling his eyes, "Yeah, Nick." He whispers, "You make me a better person, and I need you, I want to spend the rest of my life with you, and I think you're the only one for me. So if you can take me despite my faults, and despite my insecurities, and I know I can take you despite it all, we can agree that we will hurt each other, it happens, and we will fight, but we will always love each other and always help each other, and always make up, then I can be yours." 

"And I can be yours." Nick said softly, leaning his forehead against Harry's, rubbing his cheeks, kissing him softly, eyes closing. 

A few years later, the band had stopped touring. But only because Harry and Nick were having a wedding, and their daughter was going to be the flower girl. 

"Are you ready, love?" Harry whispers as he brushes through Rosie's curly hair. 

"Yes, poppy!" She giggles, smiling up widely at Harry, "You and Daddy gonna get married, like in Cinderella!" She squirms excitedly, playing with the tulle on her lilac dress.

"Yeah." Harry smiles at her, gently pinning lavender into her loose curls, "You're my gorgeous princess, you know that?" He said, finally lifting her up, kissing her cheeks. 

"I know, and daddy the king of the house." She hugs Harry's neck, "You're the queen."

"Oh, I'm the queen?" He smiles, carrying her into the small area where the wedding was going to be held, "If you say so, sweetheart, just don't tell your daddy, I think he thinks he's the queen." He sets her down, kissing her nose, "You stay here with Uncle Niall, and he's gonna walk with you down the carpet and you're gonna throw these pretty roses out, okay?" 

She nods quickly, a gleaming, dimpled smile wide across her face, "I know, poppy! We practiced. I throw the roses, like me! My name is Rosie!" She smiles up at Niall, laughing and squealing.

"I love you, sweetheart, I've got to go get ready." He kisses her head, rushing off. He walked past the room where Nick was getting ready, and was tempted to go in, "Nick?" He said, knocking on the door, taking a deep breath. 

"What? You can't see him before the wedding." Aimee gasped, poking her head out of the door, "Mr.Styles, I'm ashamed that you'd try to break tradition."

"Aims." Harry sighs, pouting, "I just want to give him a kiss."

"No kisses until you say I do." She pushes him down the hallway, "Go get ready, move along."

After the longest hour of his life, here he was, His mum, Robin, Gemma, and all the boys walking him down the aisle, Nick standing at the end of it, looking beautiful as ever. 

"Hi." Harry whispered, once he finally was standing in front of Nick. 

"Hiya, popstar." Nick smiled his cheekiest grin, grabbing Harry's hands, squeezing them. 

And that was it. Nick and Harry were soon-to-be in domestic bliss, and soon found out that while they had one girl, they would soon have another child living in their house. 

"Nick." Harry groaned, hitting at him, "Turn your alarm off, quiff head."

"Mm." Nick mumbles, pressing the snooze, cuddling into Harry, wrapping his arms around him, rubbing his stomach, "Hi, little one." He smiled, pressing his nose into Harry's neck, "Still can't believe you're pregnant again."

"And I still can't believe that you've gotten me pregnant again." He grumbles, closing his eyes, "Go back to sleep." He rolls over, pecking Nick. 

"Don't be grumpy, Harold."

"Don't call me Harold." Harry whines, pouting and opening his eyes. 

"Okay, husband." Nick whispered, kissing him lovingly. 

"I love you." Harry stroked his face.

"I love you too." 

_Fin._


End file.
